Personal Family Business Story 

I am part of the 3rd generation in a family business. The story of which is in some ways quite tragic, although as I write this, it is the first time I've thought of it as tragic. I will tell it as I remember it being told, and with my own perspectives and biases. 

My grandfather emigrated from Spain with his brother to "make it" in America. After spending time in Cuba and New York, they decided to settle in the hot and humid city of Coatzacoalcos, Mexico. They started a fish transport company, and after it became successful, my grandfather's brother decided to go back to Spain. My grandfather stayed and dutifully kept records for the part of the profit that belonged to his brother as a partner in the company. From his own share of the profits, he saved and built a small hotel. When my granduncle came back to Mexico for a trip and saw the hotel, he thought he should be a partner in the hotel also, but my grandfather didn't agree with that. He only gave him his share of the profit from the fish transport company. They never spoke again after that.

Sibling rivalry notwithstanding, the hotel did well and my grandfather built a second bigger hotel. When it was almost done, my grandfather leaned on a wall on the roof that had not yet dried and fell 5 stories. He didn't survive the fall. 

He died without a will and of course without any "succession planning". My father was living in Mexico City at the time and was a young public accountant at Pete Marwick (now KPMG). He was being groomed to go to the New York office. My uncle, who was older than my brother, hadn't finished college. He was a ladies man and after my grandmother caught him with a girl "wasting his time" she decided to bring him back to Coatzacoalcos with her. In some ways, he would never recover from that. He had the curse of being handsome and charming.

After my grandfather's passing, my father left Mexico City and came back to the small town to head the family business. In a way, he also became the head of the family, although he always reported to my grandmother and followed what she said. 

With loans and personal efforts, the bigger hotel was finished and furnished. My dad managed it for 35 years after that. In addition, he started a car rental agency and my mother started a travel agency.  Similarly to the previous generation, my father's siblings would come to resent him for building companies of his own for which he didn't share the profit. Over 35 years, a lot of resentment was built but kept under the surface while my grandmother lived.  

My uncle started and failed in several businesses. Throughout the years, he received from the hotel a salary similar to my dad's even if he wasn't working in it. But he never enjoyed the stability or the status in the community that my father built.

I also have two aunts. One of them worked at the hotel for over 35 years. The other married, had 6 children, and then divorced. Her relationship with my grandmother was always somewhat strained. When my grandmother had 2 houses built, one for my uncle and one for my aunt, my aunt decided she didn't like it and didn't move in until 2 years after it was built. My uncle sold his house almost immediately. 

As I paint the picture of the situation, it becomes very easy to see that there were a lot of things that were not working quite the way my grandmother imagined them in the family. They say that when she was alive she would often comment about how we weren't like some of the other families who had so much family drama. One of the first lessons we need to learn is that whatever we say we are "not" we actually are and probably in direct proportion to how much we deny it.

When my grandmother decided it was time to pass her inheritance to her children before she died, everyone was in agreement and it seemed that any future squabble would be prevented. The bigger hotel was split amongst the 4 children according to the following percentages: 28% for my dad and 24% for each of the other 3 siblings. My grandmother had originally suggested that they should split it 40% for my dad and 20% for the other 3. My dad, since he didn't want any trouble with his siblings, said that 28% would be enough to break any ties if they needed to make a voting decision. And so it was arranged.

A couple of years later my father got ill and stepped down from the helm of the hotel and my uncle took the reigns. What the family didn't know was that my uncle had harbored the thought all this time that his father had meant the bigger hotel to go completely to him as the older and preferred son in the family. And so it is that a few years after my grandmother died, he sued his siblings to take possession of the hotel. After he sued, my parents received a lot of bad advice and the situation was made worse. After 7 years in the corrupt Mexican courts, the lawsuit hasn't ended yet. 

The lawsuit has made everybody economically worse off except for lawyers and judges. None of the heirs have received dividends from the hotel in the last 10 years. Because courts have cancelled the hotel's bank accounts, he is forced to use cash so his employees steal from him. He lives in paranoia because he doesn't have any savings but has 3 families he would like to take care of (he's been married 3 times). My dad fell into a depression after he heard of the lawsuit and it lasted a few years. My older aunt is really tired of worrying over this, and my younger aunt blames everybody else and makes things worse in the process.

So it is the tragedy of the hotel that killed my grandfather and recruited his children to fight over itself.

But it is not all bad, it has taught us great life lessons. My side of the family has learned to love and forgive. I feel very lucky that I don't harbor resentment against my uncle, and that, as a result of the family dynamics that I observed, I got interested in practicing relationship systems work.